Barjokes 101 pt_7
Bar patrons - who are they?
Remember these for those special times........
...a man walked into a bar and sat down, ordering a beer. as he sipped the beer, he heard a soothing voice say "nice tie!". looking around he noticed that the bar was empty except for himself and the bartender at the end of the bar. a few sips later the voice said "beautiful shirt". at this, the man called the bartender over. "hey...i must be losing my mind" he told the bartender. "i keep hearing these voices saying nice things, and there's not a soul in here but us." "it's the peanuts" answered the bartender. "say what?" "you heard me" said the barkeep. "it's the peanuts.....they're complimentary."
...A man walks into a bar with a steering wheel on his dick. He walks up to the barman. The barman looks at him and says, "Hey, did you know you've got a steering wheel on your dick?", and the man repies, "Yeah, it's driving me nuts".
...A drunken polish guy walks into a bar and puts his money down and orders a bourbon. Several minutes go by and suddenly the drunken polish guy leans over and tells the bartender "hey, theres a gorilla at the other end of the bar." The bartender replies "that's my pet gorilla, Mable." "I never knew anybody who had a gorilla for a pet" replied the Polish guy. The bartender then tells the customer "watch this" and calls out "Mable, get over here." Mable comes over to the bartender and while standing in front of the bartender, the bartender reaches behind the bar and grabs a hammer, hits Mable in the head with it. Mable drops to her knees, pulls down the bartenders zipper, takes out his penis and starts sucking it. The drunken polish guy is in total shock and exclaims "I never saw anything like that before." The bartender then tells the pollock "You want one." The pollock tells the bartender "Ok, but don't hit me in the hard so hard..."
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