Barjokes 101 pt_3
Remember these for those special times........
One night a father overheard his son saying his prayers "God bless Mommy. God bless Daddy. God bless Grammy. Goodby Grampa." Well, the father thought it was strange, but he soon forgot about it. The next day, the Grandfather died. About a month or two later the father heard his son saying his prayers again "God bless Mommy. God bless Daddy. GoodBye Grammy." The next day the grandmother died. Well, the father was getting more that a little woried about the whole situation. Two weeks later, the father once again overheard his sons prayers. "God Bless Mommy. Good bye Daddy." This alone nearly gave the father a heart attack. He didn't say anything but he got up early to go to work, so that he would miss the traffic. He stayed all through lunch and dinner. Finally after midnight he went home. He was still alive! When he got home he appologized to his wife. "I am sorry Honey. I had a very bad day at work today." "You think you've had a bad day?", the wife yelled, "The mailman dropped dead on my doorstep this morning!"
Jack & Jill were on their way home from the Bar one night and Jack got pulled over by the police. The officer told Jack that he was stopped because his tail light was burned out. Jack said, "I'm very sorry officer, I didn't realize it was out, I'll get it fixed right away." Just then Jill said, "I knew this would happen when I told you two days ago to get that light fixed." So the officer asked for Jack's license and after looking at it said, "Sir your license has expired." And again Jack apologized and mentioned that he didn't realize that it had expired and would take care of it first thing in the morning. Jill said, "I told you a week ago that the state sent you a letter telling you that your license had expired." Well by this time Jack is a bit upset with his wife contradicting him in front of the officer and he said in a rather loud voice, "#$&% Jill, will you SHUT UP!" The officer then leaned over toward Jill and asked. "Does your husband always talk to you like that?" Jill replied, "ONLY WHEN HE'S DRUNK."
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